Wednesday, October 19, 2011

playing favorites

One of my biggest pet peeves is friends and/or family who favor one of your children over the other. While my close friends know my particular situation with my children and are always quick to ask about both kids of mine, some friends and family members show extreme favoritism to one or the other. My situation is complicated and extremely difficult to discuss, but the whole "playing favorites" thing is hard for me to ignore as I am constantly faced with it. When your own mother or family member makes it incredibly apparent that they don't care about one of your children or a friend fails to recognize that you have TWO children, not one, it drives me up the fucking wall. Kids notice these things and it hurts them. I read an article today on the effects of favoritism and the ramifications can be extremely harmful to them in the present and especially in the future. I know it is hard for us parents to not have favorites at times such as when one is on the floor throwing a fit and the other is quietly painting away, but it is imperative that we try not to have favorites as it bashes their self esteem and causes emotional problems that can hold them back from successes later on in life. We all want our children to succeed and have a wonderful life, so please be fair, be kind and LOVE EVERYONE! 
Also, I would like to say we are all only human. We all make mistakes (I've made quite a few myself) or do things without realizing it. Sometimes it takes an article, a friend, movie or family member to point it out to you. But instead of getting defensive, just try and change it for the benefit of yourself and others! :)

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